The most wreached hive of scum and villiany...

It began on Thursday morning. I awoke to a full on illness. I had chills, felt tired, unable to concentrate and all I wanted to do was sleep more and more. But, with Friday as a day off I had to go into work. We even had a client in, whom I ended up having to sit with go over utilitarian footage of golf courses and somehow try to tell him how it all looked good while all I wanted to do was eat some soup and fall asleep.

I managed to leave work a little early to go home and finish packing before leaving for the airport to go to LA. We got everything together and our friend came over to got a key so she could watch the cats while we were away. She dropped us off at the Max station on her way out so we could get to the airport. This is where things start to get really bad. For the sake of trying to slightly less long-winded I will make a list of what happens next. For your viewing ease things that happened in RED are bad, things that happened in BLUE were good.

1. The Max was running late and we had to stand on the platform for 20 minutes until the airport train finally came along. Already time is running short.

2. While checking in we find out the seats we reserved next to each other were erased and we are on opposite ends of the plane from each other, both middle seats.

3. We get through security with enough time to grab some dinner before getting on the plane.

4. We got on the plane and sit there for quite a while before an announcement that they are running some maintenance tests and it will be another 15 minutes on the ground.

5. After 15 minutes they tell us there is another test they have to run, as the last one failed. it will be another 19 minutes.

6. After 19 minutes they tell us there is a broken valve on the landing gear and they are going to see if there is a part around they can replace it with and it will be an indefinite wait.

7. After another 20 minutes or so they tell us to get off the plane because it's too hot and we are going to be waiting for a long time.

8. Waiting the the terminal they tell us they are trying to get us on another plane, but there are no guarantees. After listening to several other passengers cuss out the ticket agents, and the passing of about an hour they tell us we are going to be able to take another plane, and it will just be a few more minutes.

9. After several more minutes still nothing has happened. Several more minutes, and they tell us it will be a few more minutes to board the new plane. Then - oh wait - change of planes, in all this waiting they were able to repair the original plane, so we all are going to get back on that plane.

10. In all that waiting we changed our seats to be next to each other. When we finally go to re-board the plane we discover the new seats are also invalid, so we have to go switch then again. We are the next to last people to board the plane. Then there are already people sitting in our new, new seats and we end up somewhere else all together.

11. They give us free booze on the plane.

12. We finally get into LA about 12:30am, when our original landing time was 10:20pm. By the time we get out bags it's a few minutes after 1am. Now, to wait on the curb for our car rental shuttle.

13. Forward 20 minutes, the bus finally comes. We get to the rental agency and walk in the doors. We are almost done! We turn the corner to see a line wrapping around with a wall full of women with small children waiting in line, and one lone agent.

14. Fast Forward another whole hour. We finally get our car at about 3am. It's a nice car, and brand new. Only had 2 miles on it.

15. We get to our studio guesthouse we rented for the weekend and it's nice!

16. We have a nice day wandering around our old haunts in the Valley and then go to Santa Monica, wander, go on the ferris wheel (and I get scared), then leave to get dinner before going to a play in the evening.

17. Oh--I FORGOT! My ears would not pop on the plane. On the way back down my right ear was throbbing and jut wouldn't pop. Right now, almost 24 hours later my right ear still has not popped and I can't hear conversations when David walks on my right side.

18. We tried to go to dinner and got caught in LA traffic at 5pm on a Friday, which I guess can't be considered a negative, but only an inevitability. But, we didn't have time to get a real dinner and ended up going to In-n-Out Burger, which is good. But we got into a fight trying to find it. But it was really good.

19. Fast forward circling Westwood for about 30-45 minutes taking wrong turns and almost getting into wrecks trying to find a parking garage at UCLA. We finally find it. Curtain call is in 15 mintues and I still have to change and actually eat my burger!

20. Everything gets done in time. The play is awesome and intense and I am still trying to digest it all. I need to see it again and read the script alone to really get a grasp on it. It was intense and crazy and awesome. Did I mention intense? But awesome? It was.

21. Afterward I can't track down any available friends so we head back to the guesthouse. we stop off and get a bottle of wine and some snacks. When back at the guesthouse we go to open the wine and we can't get the cork out. we try everything and it just won't open. Knives, prying, poking, it doesn't budge. I finally break down. It's the little act of lack of alcohol that has pushed me over the edge.

22. David goes back out and gets Crown Royal and some Coke. i'm feeling better.

Well, now you are up to date on my LA trip so far. All I can figure is that the universe is trying to tell me to be patient and not live in LA. I get it. I will be and I won't. I don't know why it keeps pushing this lesson down my throat, but I would really like to have a nice remainder of my trip. So, if you are listening Universe - I get it! Thank you! now back off. Sincerely, Liz.